Entry 426

The Holder of Idiocy

Classification

Internet Folklore / Ritual Horror

Archive Status

Preserved

Original Signal

theholders.org

Wayback Timestamp

20100315112315

Long ago, jesters would impress royalty all over the world with jokes and crazy antics that would, above all, give kings and queens a break from their duties for relaxation and entertainment. Some queens, already unfaithful for marrying simply for power, would fall for the jester and would have an affair. Kings usually found out from other servants and the jester was either excommunicated or executed, the latter occurring obviously more. The queen usually didn't suffer as much, for lies told by a wife are more believable than that of lowly jesters...

In any city, anywhere in the world where royalty may have lived, go on a castle tour. You may as well learn a little while on this tour, but try and break away from the group, and try to find the throne room, but if it is only you and a guide, convince him or her to meet with the Holder of Idiocy.

Without the guide, after locating the throne room, sit in the king's (or queen's, depending on your gender) chair and close your eyes, even nap if you'd like; They know you've had it rough, and it only gets worse as you continue.

The guide, if he or she was faithful, will allow you to sit on the king's (or queen's) throne, but convince them to shut their eyes. Once they comply, the true search for this particular Holder begins.

After you wake or the guide vanishes before your eyes, the throne room will glow with torches lit on the walls and the room will be lively, as if there were a ball. You will seem to have gone back in time to when the castle was young.

The clothes you came in are gone, and you are now dressed in royal garb, which is extremely uncomfortable. Don't be too shocked, the guests are never as they seem. Soon, after a stressful and itchy wait, a jester, grinning from ear to ear, is dressed in a purple and green suit, and he wobbles to and fro for comedic effect.

He may tell off-color jokes that make your sides split in pain from the hilarity, but he may also be very bland and boring. Wait through it, and depending on your sex, either stay or excuse yourself.

If you are female, head to the restroom, and never lose sight of the jester. Follow him into his quarters. He will not give in to your desires, but your husband will believe anything. Lie to him, execute the jester.

If you are male, the queen will excuse herself after the jester leaves. Talk to your guests; each one represents an object you have obtained or destroyed. You may learn nothing, but if you do, it will be forgotten after receiving your